Picture this.
You’re trying to take headshots of an uncooperative child who won’t stand still even for a millisecond in front of your camera or your backdrop. 🤦♀️
Another one is running wild in your studio, hanging off doors, C-Stands, throwing around equipment, playing with computers, making a mess while eating snacks (and dropping CHOCOLATE on the floor for your dog to eat), and turning up the music so it feels like you’re in a club.
All while the parents do nothing, forcing you to split your focus on the shoot and the kid wreaking havoc on your studio.
I take that back. All the while the parents give the kids snacks 🍬 and sugary foods, rewarding their bad behavior and causing more disruption.
I had to end this particular session before we even got through less than half of the looks.
We were supposed to do 3 looks for each child and a family portrait, but we ended up barely getting through 2 looks for one child— and only 1 for another. It was literally impossible.
This is because the chaos I described above is no exaggeration.
The kids were just not into getting their photos taken. 🤷♀️
So I simply charged them for the number of looks we did get and called it quits.
What came next really got under my skin. The parents asked for a re-shoot.
They commented on how their kids look shy in the pictures, but aren’t in real life.
Of course I said no. With few exceptions, I stick to my policies.
Including the no re-shoot policy (unless for gear ⚙️ malfunction).
By the way, do you have a re-shoot policy? Let me know in the comments if you want the deets on mine for an upcoming post.
Back to the nightmare clients… they got amazing pictures. They just didn’t get as many options. And if their kids wouldn’t cooperate, well, that’s not on me.
But here’s what irked me.😡 It was as if they weren’t in the room and didn’t see how their kids literally had ZERO ability to stand in front of my backdrop for even a second.
It was as if they didn’t see how hard I tried and how good I did… considering the situation.
And then it dawned on me… and I learned a huge lesson.
You must point out the elephant in the room immediately.
Because they actually DIDN’T see anything.
Because they don’t know what’s normal and what’s not.
They don’t know that their kids are difficult and that they suck too because they gave their kids candy and zero discipline and let them run around wild and touch my stuff. Can you tell I’m still irked?
They have no idea that I’m struggling.
This is MY job and only I know when it’s going smoothly and when it’s not. It’s not like they come to my studio every day to be a fly on the wall to see what a proper shoot with kids looks like.
So from then on, when I’m struggling through something, I don’t struggle through it quietly.
👉 If something isn’t going smoothly, stop and say it out loud:
“The kids are not standing still in front of my camera, they aren’t looking at it, and we aren’t going to get the best results.”
That’s what I didn’t do. They knew the kids weren’t cooperating because I stopped the shoot but I didn’t verbalize that they shouldn’t expect great results.
By being the authority and calling out the struggle in the moment, you do two things:
- You set clear expectations that the results are tied to their behavior.
- You prevent a disappointed “why are there not enough photos of my kids not looking shy, can we do a re-shoot?” email later.
Yeah maybe it feels awkward to tell a client that they’re not going to get what they came for but it’s a LOT more awkward to have to explain it after the fact when turning down a re-shoot request.
Don’t confuse being nice with being unprofessional.
A “nice” photographer who’s too afraid to point out the obvious gets complaints later.
A professional who points out the elephant in the room, sets expectations.
That way, it becomes clear that you’ve done your part and now it’s on them to do theirs.
💥Let them own it and change it… or not.
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